Life Is My Pet Peeve

***edit: autocorrect will not let me live!*** When I was growing up, I was left to my own devices for a good part of the time. Not that I was alone, but I just wasn't included in a lot of things. My siblings are at least 4 years older than me. Anyway, as the youngest I didn't get a lot of tv time which is part of the reason I don't watch a lot of tv now. However, after everyone went to sleep, or tired of tv watching, I would watch music videos and Def Comedy Jam.  Oh, Def Comedy Jam. How I loved thee! Of course, this was before life experiences forced me into grinchhood. So, I was watching Def Comedy Jam having a grand ole time. I love nothing better than to laugh. (This is probably where my love of cussing came from, too.) That night, however, I must've been enjoying it at a volume a bit louder than normal. My grandfather overheard the jokes. My grandfather IMMEDIATELY yelled for my grandmother, "Mama! (She hated being called "mama.") Do ...

I'm about to tell you guys what I've learned from boys in my own history. I want to pass on my discoveries. Tangentially (already) I cannot transition to saying men and women. I have no idea why. Men are boys (dudes, guys) and Women are girls. Know that I don't mean to offend. I write in the same terms that I think. Anyway, I will start with 2 things I've learned because the explanations and questions I have take a little while to get through. I'm writing in absolutes, but I acknowledge that these are not the opinions of all men... I acknowledge, but kind of like in a not-real-life sort of way. Entonces. Uno They are not as dumb as we think they are by any stretch of the imagination. They have managed some pretty sophisticated reverse psychology on the world in their day, so 🎼 "don't you ever for a second get ta thinking..." How on earth does one explain 75% of women not orgasming from vaginal penetration and we still know women who are...

I am a grumpy grinch. I know this about myself and I really try to take the appropriate measures to avoid tainting other ppl's day. No need for me to yuck anyone else's yum, right? I'm a "what's good for the goose is good for the gander" type of gal. I can't take a lot of stupid shit. Neither from myself nor others. When I sat down to come up with topics to start out with, for this blog, I started making a list, but at one point, I was like, "I hate everything from the time I wake up until I drag this carcass to bed at night." I crossed out what I had written and just wrote "life" in black Sharpie across the list. I hate talking to ppl I don't want to talk to. I hate being alone, but definitely hate being around others. I hate pleasantries and I hate listening to boring stories about ppl's lives. I hate how unfair life is. I hate the Jedi mind tricks that society at large plays on the masses and how, we, the mas...